Friday, June 19, 2009

Update On Baby Sage

An email from Marsha:

We went for an hour of visitation with mom and dad (who did NOT show up....big surprise!) Right after that was Grandma's hour of visitation (who WAS there.) I had prayed that God would give us some definitive answers yesterday because the "not knowing" was putting me on an unsustainable emotional and spritual rollercoaster. During the hour when the parents didn't show, my cell phone rang. It was the attorney for the baby, whom I had been trying to get a hold of for a week and a half. (Not a coincidence that she happened to call during that time when I asked for some resolution!) She confirmed that the court did order a suitability assessment on the close family friends. This family is very close to Grandma, whom I mentioned is such a lovely, godly woman. Pending that assessment, Sage will be moved. Although they do have to go through a home study, they do not have to go through all the things we had to for certification....they are held to a lower standard due to their relationship with the family. The law supports for a child to first be placed with a relative and in the absence of an available relative, then the law states a child should try to be placed with a "non related extended family member...." bascially someone who is so close to the family they might as well be family.

Grandma and I chatted for two hours. She gave me detail after detail about all God had done to cause her to pursue this arrangement. There was nothing malicious or manipulative about was clearly the prompting of God. Although we are sad, I cannot argue with the very obvious will of God. I had prepared a photo album for Grandma that I left with her. I feel good about all she and I discussed.

The next court date is July 7 and I presume at that time, the court will order for Sage to be transferred because it's likely the fingerprinting on the family will be in. It's not uncommon for a child to be moved and the home study and home inspection be conducted after they've received her. It's possible she will be moved sooner too.....quite frankly we've learned in this system, ANYTHING IS POSSIBLE!

I am so so so so so thankful for many things in this: your emails and calls and scriptures have absolutely sustained us. THANK YOU FOR CARING AND LOVING US SO MUCH. I can't tell you how much it helped.

I'm also thankful that we have been embroiled in this with another Christian. If it had been a non-believer, I would've found myself very angry and questioning their motives. But this was definitely all played out by the hand of God. I have no right to be angry. Grandma is a loving woman who desperately seeks God's will too.

I'm also thankful that despite all the horrific actions on the part of Sage's bio mom, she did a few things right: she didn't have an abortion or dump her in a trash can somewhere. She also requested one thing when she gave her up for adoption: that she be placed in a Christian home. The mom has had a very messed up life since childhood and it helps to explain her messed up circumstances now. But she at least had enough sense to request a Christian home. Because of that request, that particular county office ended up calling Koinonia (our Christian agency) for a placement. The supervisor from that office told the grandma yesterday that they had never called Koinonia before (in 25 years) and now they would definitely use Koinonia again because of this experience. It makes me feel that in the future, many kids from the system will end up being placed in Christian homes that might not otherwise have been.

I'm so thankful Sage will be going to a Christian home who will eventually adopt her. Her parents will definitely never get her back. And I'm grateful she will have very regular contact with her two biological brothers.

I have no idea why God chose our family as His vessel for this particular assignment, but I do think we gave Sage a strong foundation of love and security for this first start to her little life.

I am SO SO SO SORRY for all the beautiful gifts so many of you have showered upon us. Although in our excitement, I took removed tags and washed much of it, some still have tags and I will do my best to return those to you. I'm sorry in all this craziness, I still haven't completed all my thank you notes, which will now have a different message! I'm sorry for the pain my kids are in knowing our time left with Sage is limited. Please continue to pray for them especially and also that this transition will definitely not happen on July 3....Skylar's birthday.

Thanks again for all your encouragement. You'll never know what it meant to us.


Anonymous said...

Message to Marsha,

God Bless your amazing and strong, you will survive this.....

It hurts because of the love you have in your heart...knowing that it helped me get through it.

Take Care


Lemonade Makin' Mama said...

what a emotional journey you've been on girl!


Rochelle Ax said...

oh my-- my prayers are with baby sage & Your kids- I'm glad you got to have that precious time with her and trust me. I have been there with my niece... I got custody of her for the first 6 months of her life and i would never give up that time and look back on it as the hardest yet most blessed time in my life. God sustained me even when she left, although my house felt far more empty I knew GOD was the one who moved her. & God placed her exactly where she needed to be with a christian family who loved her as much as i did. Please call me if you need anything- even if you want some sweet pictures with you and your little girl... i'd love to do something!
Rochelle 951.295.2180
PRAYERS for Sage and your little ones who will be missing her. :)

Kristie V said...

We can never see what is going on in the heavenly realm during such things as this. But I'm sure because of the short time she had with you, Marsha, and your family...her life will be so blessed. I remember hearing a story about my pastor...that his delivery doctor was a Christian and prophesied over my pastor that God would use him and send him to Africa someday. My pastor not only goes to Africa several times a year, he has started an orphanage, churches, and is bringing healing to hurting marraiges in Africa. And that was just a man who held this little baby for minutes. Imagine all these days you have had to hold, and love this baby, and words you have spoken over her... how they will have an eternal impact on the rest of her life. May the Lord continue to bless you and give you strength to believe Him for ALL that He has ahead of you. Your family is precious.

Anonymous said...

How do you find yourself being angry if the grandma was not a christian!!!!

Anonymous said...

So does that mean that your family only associates and gets along with and agrees with Christians

Ice Queen said...

Dear Anonymous, Even though I don't know who you are, God knows who you are. And despite what our current president says, this is a Christian nation and was founded on Christianity. Marsha is comforted to know that baby Sage will be raised up to know the true and living God. I pray that one day you will come to understand what this truly means. You are certainly entitled to your own opinion, but this isn't the correct forum for it.

Anonymous said...

OMG Anonymous...are you for real?

Marsha was at peace because they shared their hearts and God was certainly present in their conversation which gave her understanding........

And I have a dear friend who is not a christian but is the most honest and kind person I know, and am PROUD to call her my friend.....