Wednesday, April 29, 2009


Update on the Call Me Crazy Post
If you haven't read it I'd hop on over and read it so you can see how crazy I am....Then you can understand what I'm talking about here.
After this post some of you have been wondering what my 2nd opinion was.

After changing insurance and finally getting to go see a doctor I trust. The doctor ordered my medical reports from the past 2 c-sections and I went in for a not so fun exam. Long story short...The doctor sat and talked to me for a good hour about how many times Dr. opinions get in the way. He explained my reports. He also told me my uterus is very mobile(whatever that means) but he said that's good. He also said that my uterus feels as if I never carried a baby...(what???) I was told by my previous doctor that my uterus is shot and I have way too much scar tissue to have another c-section. My new doctor also was told that my c-section was about 2 inches lower than where the normal incision should be. This is what caused so much scar tissue. But, because of it being so low it allows the doctor room above for another c-section. As long as I don't mind having 2 scars (who cares)The doctor said it was actually good that they did it that way. He can work around the scar tissue. He sees no reason that I couldn't have more. He said I'm young and healthy enough to have more if I want. So, who knows??? We pray about it. I can't imagine more babies right now, but I just wanted to post this update. I am glad we didn't listen to the "mean" first doctor and went ahead with our 2nd opinion.

How many c-sections have you had? Any one have a similar situation?


Loni's World said...

That is great news! (SHUSH you people that think she is crazy!) It is YOUR family and if you guys decide to have more kids that is awesome. Just keep you healthy. This would be a different story if you were unable to care for more. I don't see the problem most of our grandparents/parents were 1 of 12 or more kids and people these days just don't get that.

Newlywed Next Door said...

Just found your blog. Super cute! Your kids are adorable. Where in Southern California do you live? I live in Long Beach!

EveryGoodGift said...

I have had 4 c-sections...every time I go in, they tell me how good I look,inside) and that you couldn't tell that I have had 6 kids. My Dr. told me with this last one that he had just delivered a lady's 9th by c-section. I don't know if he thought that I needed that info for the future or what) Other than having some anesthesia issues, I would say that the surgeries have gotten easier on me.(physically, not emotionally) I wish they would let me keep having them au NATURALE...I prefer it that way, but I understand why they can't. As far as having more....that is YOUR business...God will give you what you need, if He blesses you with more. I know that first hand.

Joanna said...

You're not crazy. I have a similar story. We have five daughters and just can't bring ourselves to say "we're done" for sure. They truly are a blessing to us. We have no peace about not having more.

Personally I've done vag, CS, VBAC, VBAC, VBAC. I pushed hard for VBAC. A friend of mind had all four of her kids CS. Do you get the Quiverfull digest? I used to and plenty of the women that subscribe to the digest have had 9 CSs.

Too Many Kids In The Bathtub said...

OH Bridget!!!!! I just read the original post. It was almost as though I was reading my own thoughts!!!!! YOU ARE NOT ALONE!!!!!! AND CERTAINLY NOT CRAZY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I always knew I wanted a big family. But I never really defined big in my mind. We had our first the month before I turned 20. We gave our lives to the Lord and We got married a few months later. A few months after that our second was born. I knew immeditely after he was born I wanted more!!!! Like right after I gave birth to him!!! PEOPLE thought I was CRAZY!!!!! I began praying for the Lord to take this desire away from me. I have always been the object of criticism. It has separated me from my family in hurtful ways even though I am close with them. I have been called irresponsible, selfish, and many more names. I could not understand why I still had this desire even years later!!! I was also introduced to the quiverfull movement a few years ago. In my spirit it felt right. So not what others would say though. I am with you when I do not understand why we are to submit all aspects of our lives but fertility is up to us. I STILL wanted more children right after little Madeline was born. It is hard to explain. I am content in the here and now, but My spirit longs for more children. I know the Lord has more children for us!!! I am just resting in him that he knows when!!! I have since learned that this desire is from God. I DO NOT fully understand it myself!!! Thank you for sharing your heart!!!!!

Anonymous said...

Hi Bridget,
I have had one C-section and it was a hard recovery. I know when we have another child I will have to have another one. Although, it will be scheduled instead of a surprise. Aside from the occasional numbness I am fine. I had hoped they would go in and do a tummy tuck too, but my insurance didn't think that would be a good idea. Now my scar is my own personal reminder of my wonderful son Nolan. BTW, I am at odds to having a second child. My husband and I want to, but we are still torn on when and other details. I am an only child and hate it as I always wished for siblings. I don't want my son to go through what I went through. Reading your blogs makes me want more. You are a great mom. You make parenting look so simple. :)
Caroline Beno

EveryGoodGift said...

It is me again...I just finished reading your original post...GOSH...Are we twins...Are we connected somehow? So interesting to hear that God is moving so many people this way. I know that Isaid before that God spoke to me about WHO was in CONTROL of my life...COMPLETE control...I had to admit that it wasn't HIM up until that time. God had to do some MAJOR heart surgery on me and my husband...He knows that I always will have room in my heart for another...and another...and another, now that GOD moved out some selfishness, pride, vanity, things of that nature..LOL! I look at my kids and I think...How could anyone throw this in a DUMPSTER...Just tonight, my oldest was here telling me about a GIRl that is having twins soon..she doesn't want them...I said...I DO!!! I KNOW that NOTHING is wrong with us that have this mind...It is something RIGHT with us. ;o) When my husband tells me that I look SO good with a baby in my arms...It makes me want to keep one in my arms. I love what I do..My mom may have a heart attack...especially if i get pregnant again...but I wouldn't trade my life with anyone else. Thank you LORD!

Shannon said...

Caroline... If you look back on this remember that all pregnancies and all recoveries are different. My first CS was a difficult recovery, but they have gotten easier... MUCH! You also get smarter about what helps you recover... With my first I refused follow-up meds for two days. With the others I took as much as I could have and it allow my muscles to relax and heal quicker... much quicker.

Bridget- I have had 6 pregnancies w/ 2 losses. So, CS, loss, CS, loss, CS, CS. All four live births have been via CS. I have had an incredibly arrogant and opinionated doc with the last 3 pregnancies. The probblem is that he is great at his job, if he would just keep his mouth shut. He actually straightened out my scar to perfection after a chop job by the "on call" doctor during my preg#5 delivery. He is a surgeon with excellent skill, but he is one of those that think all people should only have 2 kids. He was nice enough to say during the CS last time that I physically (internally & externally) look as if it was my first. So, I did attend my follow-up visit. ;) Uh, but then he got on my nerves about birth control options and vasectomy talk. I will be searching out another doc. I actually tried to switch mid-way through the last pregnancy, but the other doc I wanted did not like the idea of it. I love my children and I wish I could have a million when I look at there faces. I can't imagine never holding my own baby. I am at a point where I am frightened by the idea of having more... physical issues with circulation problems and veins, etc., but I can not make it "final" to stop. I am at a crossroads and am 36. If you want them have them!! Don't waste life wanting them and regretting that you listened to some doc that gave you bad advice. I talk to people all the time that look at our kids and say, "Ohh, I wanted more, but...." Don't do that... don't have that regret. Congrats on your positive check-up.

Just FYI... EveryGoodGift and I are best friends in the "real world".. been together since I was 8 months old and moved next door to her. We are loving your blog!!

Too Many Kids In The Bathtub said...

Well said!!!!

Rochelle Ax said...

Yayeee!! I love taking your newborns pictures so I'm happy, and u know what i say bridg... We always need more christians! :) LOVE U!!
((3 c-sections here...but I'm done because my body is allergic to my husbands blood and fights these little babies! :*()) or i'd have 3 more! :)

Brittany Ann said...

I follow your blog but haven't really commented until today, when I read this post and the previous one about the QF movement.

I just want to thank you for posting this. I'm newly married, and my husband and I have been struggling with the concept of QF. In essence, it's everything we stand for, but people act that, because we are both young professionals, newly married, successful, "hip"(haha, not really), that this is a ridiculous concept and that we are crazy. We get the whole, "How do you know it's right for you, you know, to have a baby right now? No one can be a SAHM these days. Why you? You haven't even been married a year! Are you ready to give up half your income? Why not wait till you're sure it's the right time? Do you want to spend the next 20 years of your life pregnant? What happens if you can't afford them?"

When we honestly open up and answer those questions, we always conclude that we'd rather have babies than a huge house, that God works it all out in the end, and that if I got to have beautiful babies after being pregnant for 20 years, bring it on!

I, too, can't quelch the desire to have children, even though I'm only 24, and even though I'm educated and have a job I love. I'd honestly, truly give it up tomorrow if I became a mother.

The only time I feel we doubt this is when the rest of the world (friends, family) enters with their "rational" perspective. But in the end, even when we consider this "rational" perspective, it never makes sense to us. The whole thought of avoiding pregnancy actually makes me miserable, sick to my stomach.

It seems that all people who even propose to leave conception up to Him instead of us are painted with this "backwoods" brush. Like you said, it's as if they think we'll all end up in Arkansas with the Duggars (although, my hubs is from the town they live in, so who knows! lol)

So, I guess I just wanted to say thank you for sharing this. Thank you for letting the world know that there are those of us out there who want large families and aren't stuck in the 19th century. Thank you for letting those of us out here know that we are not alone, crazy, or desperate, that we are, in fact, really trying to listen to what we are called to do.

God bless your family!

Simply Blessed said...

I'm happy for you guys. Whatever God's plan is will be the perfect number of children. You and Justin do a great job and have such beautiful well behaved children (even at Disneyland when you aren't there :)). I just don't understand doctors like that. After Kyndall my doctor was very pushy about me 'tying my tubes' it was so uncomfortable! I said no and he kept asking, and then even asked me once she was out!! He said 'I can do it really quick.. you have your two now. It will take 5 mins' I was like NO! Thank goodness. But so weird. Why do doctors act this way?

Love your blog said...

The world could only be so lucky to have more children in it like yours!!!! =)

I think other people brought this up before, but have you ever considered adopting? Your family would be a great home for an orphaned child. Just a thought!

Bridget said...

Yes, my husband and I often talk about adoption. We just got an email from a ministry asking if we were interested. We don't know yet if this is the Lord's will for our life. I love children and I believe this may be my calling???I feel the Lord laying it on my heart a lot lately. I am not sure if I am done yet having my own babies or if adoption is in his plan??? I want to do what the Lord has called me to do. Well see!!! Exciting either way...

crazymamaof3 said...

oh bridget..this has been bothering me for so long..this is definately on my would of, could of list..I have 3 sons who although i'm married..i pretty much raise on my own..My youngest has a lot of issues, deaf,autism, etc. and my 2nd son spent 30 days in the NICU fighting for his life after he was you can see why I was so scared that I got my tubes tied. Now..4 years later I desire for more children, especially a daughter. However, everyone, except my husband who would gladly have 500 kids, thinks I'm crazy. So..blah blah the conclusion is..pray about adoption..there are so many kids out there who would find solace and peace in your home..but if you can and want to have more biological kids..more power to you. You know people make fun of the Duggars but those people truly are following god's will. Good luck

Nicholle said...

That is beyond wonderful news. I am so happy that you can keep making beautiful christian children.

Melissa said...

I don't even know where to start with all this!!! Here comes a novel!! You sound so much like me!!! I have had 4 c-sections (5 kids). I have always wanted a large family and we have never prevented children during our marriage of ~8 years. After the twins were born (and a very rough delivery where I retained some placenta, hemmorhaged and ended up in the ICU for my babies' first day), I told myself we were 100% done. I thought about how I was going to "prevent" pregnancy though and it just depressed me. Hence I just counted on breastfeeding twins to do the job (and a fine job it did).

I hoped and prayed that the "DONE" feeling would come over me one day. Everyone would tell me "oh, after this time I felt it" or "after that I felt it", but instead I was still feeling like someone was missing and it was getting stronger by the day. It didn't make any sense and I couldn't will it away. I STILL can't will that feeling away, no matter how hard I try. Lately I keep thinking about how much being quiverful fits into our our beliefs and ideology. But I don't know, can you be quiverful with a mess of c-sections under your belt?? I don't know! We still have yet to prevent pregnancy, but I do feel like my body is still doing some healing from the twins.

I am now doing a lot of hoping and praying that God will help me in this path of my life. I pray just about daily in regards to finding peace with the number of children we are meant to have. I want more least one more, maybe me...and I just hope that maybe if I left it up to God, then maybe I could finally find the peace I have been searching for this last 18 months! Every time I have gotten pregnant/had a baby, I have felt that they were missing before...and each one was a perfect addition to our family and my heart. And its there for sure, on my mind every hour of every day! Why would God give me this feeling, if it wasn't meant to result in a child???

I am conflicted bc I know it can get more risky the more c-sections you have. And I had major issues last c-section, but was it due to the "high risk-ness" of twins, or the fact that it was my 4th c-section?? I don't know. My last ob/gyn moved away, my ob/gyn from my first three children was VERY opinionated with her opinion that more then 2 kids is selfish, so now I am left looking for another ob/gyn...and not sure how to even find a dr willing to hear me out. That part is depressing for sure.

And of course, when I mention this to others, looking for some advice as to a dr that is similarily minded, I get the "you are absolutely insane look". I hear the "you're just addicted to having babies-you are trying to be the next octomom". Yeah, maybe I am addicted....addicted to creating new life, growing that life, birthing that life, loving that life, feeding that life, raising that life, educating that life, laughing with and hugging and kissing that life, all the while thanking God every day for that life. If its my "addiction" so be it!!!

Anyways, congrats on the awesome dr appt and great news!!! I would be elated to hear such a wonderful report! One last thing (so sorry for the novel, I wasn't kidding about it it being long), how did you go about finding a doctor open to the subject? Anyways, thanks for an inspiring post (this one and the other one as well!) Makes me feel quite a bit more hopeful/optimistic for sure!!

Amanda said...

Just found your blog in my Favorites...who knows how long it's been there!

Anywho I needed this today. I myself have had 3 CS. I just wanted to thank you for both posts, esp. the first one! We are currently trying for our 4th baby. After having problems conceiving #3, we're worried what this holds in our cards. Between each of our children we've used some form of BC. I'm not proud of it, and even asked DH to NFP last time around but he insisted we not. We were talking the other night, and he has come to the realization that he want's however many children the Good Lord will give us.

DH is the youngest of 8 kids, we have 24 nieces and nephews. Big families run on his side, so there it isn't a problem. I'm the oldest of 3, and when I told my mom I was pg with #3 she asked me why? I fear her reaction when we do get pg. again. People can be harsh whether they know you or they are complete strangers! Keep letting God help you make decisions.