Normally I'd like to say I'm pretty calm and collective. I've been told even in public by strangers that I have a lot of patience in dealing with my kids. I've been known to keep my cool while a couple of kids are throwing fits or tantrums in the store. (you know kinda like Michelle from the Duggars) Ok, my voice isn't that soft but I am pretty calm. I am a layed back kind of person. I'm the type of mom who whistles to myself (or sings) while pushing a cart full of kids screaming at Target. I'm like dooo -ta- dooo...do you hear anything???? But not yesterday! OH, no....and I even have witnesses....Let me try and paint a picture of what yesterday looked like. Actually let me back up a few days.....
It's Tuesday and house is a mess. Lots of laundry and husband brings home trailer and starts unloading it into the garage. Tents, sleeping bags, beach chairs, you name it he is putting it the garage along side all my dirty laundry. Then he leaves it....ok, I keep my cool. I clean the house and the trailer. No, problem!
Now lets move onto last night....
I'm making dinner, I have 2 kids in the pool which I am watching with my (right eye) while my left eye is on the stove. I have 1 kid on the computer who is finishing a report that was due 2 days ago for a class he is taking. (He's frustrated and in tears needing help) I have Farrah glued to my leg and a baby with a high fever on my hip. I'm out of baby Tylenol. I call my sister who is on her way to my house with my other sister and grandma to go shopping for my cousins shower that were throwing at my house this weekend, I ask her if she can bring some baby Tylenol. She says sure she's on her way. I try and get all kids fed, help with homework, and try to hang curtains before I leave that I bought 3 weeks ago.....forget it who needs curtains up now....
Knock at door, everyone is here.....
Sister forgets Tylenol, my husband says just go he's got it handled. I'm hesitant to leave but do and head off to go shopping. Sigh of relief just to get out..... We leave to go shopping and we were only gone about an hour. We get home open the garage and start to load the outside fridge with all the food......
The garage opens and all hell breaks loose.........(for me anyway)
Everything just hit me at once...
I have one kid in wet trunks from swimming(or pee) who knows... riding a scooter down the street (it's like 7:30 at night)
I have another with a full diaper running around the garage barefoot....
I have another still working on report.
I have a baby still hot with fever.
Then Faith decides to bring her hamster down so my sister(the animal lover) can take a look at it because something is wrong with it. (We are all still in the garage loading food)
Remember the garage is full of laundry and crap from the trailer?
Oh, and a dog and a dog cage full of poop and a rabbit and a rabbit cage full of poop. Oh, and dishes all over from dinner that I didn't get to because we had to leave... and a back yard full of goggles and pool toys that no one put away after swimming....
I know I'm all over the place with my story but that's kinda how I felt last night...my mind all over the place.
So, I'm yelling at my half naked kids to get in the house again so they don't catch a cold while Faith's hamster is having a stoke or seizure or something and is dying. Faith is in tears. My sister's start yelling at me on how I don't need anymore pets (or kids) etc etc as they are cleaning out the hamster cage....
My grandma is trying to find a diaper to change Farrah.
Then Austin comes out to the garage to remind me his bearded dragon needs more crickets and that he's still only on his 1st paragraph.
Dog pees on garage floor right next to my foot, Austin grabs a clean bath towel from the laundry pile and starts to clean it up......
This is where I lost it. I started throwing beach chairs across the garage (right in front of my poor grandma) and yelling (with smoke coming out my ears)and kicking animal cages......oh, it was not pretty. Everyone just stood there wide eyed and stared at me.......
Gosh, that felt good!!!!!!!!!!!
I feel so bad for doing it (especially in front of the kids) but things just got way out of hand and I lost it. I don't think I have ever done that before.
And can I just say, that you will NEVER know what someone else is going through unless you have walked in their shoes. My one sister has no kids and has no idea what I do day in and day out. My other sister has a perfect clean house and will never know(ok, she's on her 2nd now) maybe she will get a glimpse at what my life is like day in and day out.
I strive to have it all together and maybe some of you think I do by reading this blog. But I don't! I am simply a mom who wants best for her kids and trys to balance everything. I am not a clean freak, because I like to spend time with my kids but I am not a slob because I like to have a clean house....This is me, and I am no Supermom!
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It's 5:30am I have at least 2hours or so before kids wake up which I will spend some time in the word and in prayer.... because God knows I need too:)
Dear God,
I thank you for my children and all my animals(even if they get neglected sometimes). What joy my children bring to my life. At times I feel SO inadequate, SO unprepared to be their mom. Father, I need your HELP today as I care for their little bodies, help me to nurture their minds and spirts while teaching them today. I pray that they will grow to love you more and more and to be shining examples of your Kingdom. Amen
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I will post my cloth diaper review and giveaway later today.....as for the Q&A
keep questions coming (great questions) I plan on answering them all on Monday:)
TGIF:) thank God
18 comments:
We ALL have our moments like this. Believe me... I have had a few 'things throwing, cage kicking' times. I think it happens because if it doesn't we will break. You need some time for yourself because you do SO much for SO many. That is what I am finding that is the cure for me. Maybe we should start once a month dinner night with Mommies and no kids or hubbys allowed. Then we can hang out, spend time talking about our kids, and relax. Oh.. and of course EAT! No one understands life like other Mommies do, even if we have no idea what it's like to walk in eachothers shoes, we can atleast sympathize with each other:) I think it would be fun!!!
All moms have days like this! I'm sure that if I had 5 and not 2(like I do) there would be even more days like that. There have been times that I have locked myself in the bathroom and cried - and then I have to wipe up the tears and move on with the day. Our job as mom is hard...HARD sometimes, but when we look at those little faces, all the heartaches seem to go away.
It's nice to know that I'm not the only one that has these days!
Hugs!
Oh sure blame your melt down on us! I'm sure I don't know what it's like having 5 kids but I have other things to deal with too. I just like having a clean house and that's me. Plus my husband wouldn't allow me to live in clutter. I have no choice. ha Also I never said to not have more kids. But I will stand by my no more animals statement haha
You definitely need a moms night out. They are my saving grace. But don't feel guilty, ALL of us moms have done the same yelling and screaming. In fact I did yesterday at my poor son. He never knew what hit him.
Us homeschoolers don't get a break from our kids. They are with us all the time. So we're bound to snap quicker than some. Today is a new day. Be blessed.
P.S. I had my pocket cam on so I did get it all on video. I will post it on my blog later. haha jk
Oh Bridget, you make me want to come down there and give you a great big hug right now. Not only because it sounds like you need one, but also to thank you for helping me realize it happens, even to the best of us. I go through this ALL of the time!! I only have TWO kids. Just hangin there and know that there are many many of your followers praying for you!! P.S. I could not agree with "Simply Blessed" more. Mommy night FOR SURE!!!
Believe me I know how you feel (and I have one less kid). My sister has told me many times i need to stop buying my kids pets because we don't have time for them. This coming from the girl who has 5 kids is pregnant with her 6th has an emmaculate house 3 dogs, a cat, 2 birds, and 50 fish. I have to say God knows what I can handle and sometimes I doubt myself but he reminds me that I can do all thing with Christ who gives me strength. One of my favorite versus is Psalms 121: I lift up my eyes to the mountains, Where does my help come from? My help comes from the Lord, Maker of heaven and Earth...
You answered my question.....and you do as I do...pray!
Your a beautiful mom, wife and blogger!
Have a wonderful weekend!
Marie
Okay, I'm sitting in Corner Bakery, because my dear hubby knew I needed some time out ... and reading this post is bringing fat tears to my eyes. Thank you for sharing. You've no idea how many times I've completely lost it (and I, too, am a pretty calm and composed mom, for the most part!) ... anyway, it's VERY affirming to know that you are not, in fact, SuperMom!! :) Thanks for being vulnerable, Bridget. The point isn't to always be perfect, the point is to look to Him who IS perfect, and who loves us and covers us with His perfect love and grace. whew.
I've been there, well minus 4 kids and home schooling.. LOL When Im at my boiling point my dear ol hubby mentions oh its just your hormones. Not exactly what I want to hear, it seems to make me more angry. I just want to run as fast as I can screaming down the street pulling my hair out. If it didnt make me feel like a bigger fool.. I know its easier said than done but just relax. Life is not that hard.... and in the famous words of my dear ol hubby maybe its your hormones. lol ha ah you cant slap me through the computer. Have a better day.
HUGS to you. Kids or not all of us go through this. I was at my boiling point too. If you dont get the little things out you tend to blow up. Ask someone to be your ear when you need it and let it out when you can :)
None of that makes you a bad mom. Something would be wrong with you if you didnt react lol
We all have moments like that! Don't feel bad. I am just amazed that you can stay calm and make it through most days without having a fit. I know I would!
I have a much lower patience threshold than you do. None of us are perfect and need to let it all out from time to time.
HA! I've had that day, too. I'm glad you're better now.
Wow! It took five kids for you to reach this point! ;) I am impressed! Most people get to that point with only one. Come on... don't you remember how hard you probably thought one was? I do. Now I have four and I love it, but it is tough. No advice from me, though. You mentioned you are praying and that is the best thing. Maybe all the ones that were there for the "scene" will look deeper and realize that it is hard even though you make it look joyous! Sometimes we make it look so easy that they don't think we struggle. I rarely have anyone lift a finger to help (except hubby) in my darkest, hardest moments. They think I can "just handle it all".... AS IF ANYONE COULD! We are not invincible. We are just Moms! Not SuperMoms.... Why don't people realize the more "resposibilities" you have the more you have to balance or juggle. And at a certain point you realize that your kids are more important than spotless floors, etc. Clutter just has to live with you until the kids are old enough to really help... Lord knows if we do not train our kids to help, then no one else is going to step up and do it. :)
Don't worry, you're not the only Mommy who has done that and you won't be the last. Us Mommies have a lot on our minds and shoulders at ALL times and sometimes it gets too heavy. If things get crazy at my house, I tell my Husband to take over while I put myself in a "time out" :) I only wish I could take a minute for every year like they say. 29 minutes of peace and quiet would be great!!
Wow!!! What a day!!! Still you are a wonderful momma!!!!
Oh my, I would have FREAKED out too.
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